Adventures in Furriedom

I am in to my third day of laying wooden flooring through our hall, kitchen and dining room. I think Claire doesn't mind it taking so long, she bought it eight years ago and has been waiting for me to lay it since then :o

There are good and bad features to training with one of your closest friends.

It helps that you are relaxed in each other's company, you can point out mistakes and offer advice without coming across as a dick. You can share moments of humour which other people just would not get. It is always slightly easier to roll around half naked with a man after you have cleaned up his puke, some of the barriers have been removed. Afterwards you get the chance to chat over the session and review what improvements need to be made. It is of course always good to have shared experiences with friends, it brings you closer.

On the minus side when it comes to sparring the both of you go 100% to beat the shite out of each other for five minutes. I mean balls out, veins bulging, cursing the Gods, praying to your mother 100% with two decades of pride, honour and cussing rights on the line*. When you have four more rounds of sparring to go with other people this might not be the most sensible approach. I got so tired in the next round that I found myself laying on top of someone breathing through my arse and dribbling all over him from my gumshield. I apologised for drooling into his mouth and then promptly did it again. He claimed cramp to escape from 'The Human Mattress of Vileness'.

All of which leaves me today as a total physical wreck. I had to get rescued from a chain on a set of stairs already this morning because my legs were too sore to move above hip level from standing. It helped that I was in uniform and a platform of people were staring. I think I am going to mainline some TCP and see if that helps.

Busy day ahead, working with lots of confused customers getting kicked out here because of engineering works further down the line, then going to watch Fitzgerald and BO'D get a hatrick each in the second Lions test, afterwards on to my Godson's birthday party before going out for a meal tonight for a friend's birthday. Then tomorrow I have a relaxing 16 hour shift at work.

2 weeks to go until I run my 10km run around London again. No worries doing it as I have run further in training. I am hoping to do a half marathon in the autumn. Also got tickets to my first ever** airshow. Lots of planes and stuff I guess.

Hope y'all are well.

*Neither of us got a submission. More an indication of stubborness rather than defensive prowess.

**My brother claims I was at an airshow as a baby where a motorcyclist tried a stunt and died in flames in front of us. Now that would be an awesome first memory but alas it hasn't stuck.

For the first time in a long time a book made me cry today. The Kindness of Women by J G Ballard.

( Spoilers )

Fess up, what book made you cry most recently?

I had a post deleted from the Richard Morgan thread. I have no problem with having posts deleted. Whatever. I do feel the need to point out what he wrote to move me to being rude to him.

2nd post down.
http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?showtopic=32952&st=100

I told him to get over himself. I stand by that viewpoint.

Sorry to have missed so many people last weekend. Sounds like the craic was mighty. If I did have to miss you all at least I had a top weekend myself in Dublin watching UFC. Fella from my gym won and looked good and the atmosphere was electric. There is talk of a regular Paddy's Day event in Dublin, that would be amazing.

Anyway here is a photo from the weekend. I call this 'The New York Badass vs The London Fatass'




PS. An e-mail of mine got read out on my favourite radio show. It is the little things that get you through :)

2pumps hates me. That can be the only explanation.

I feel like Liam Neeson has unloaded one of his unfeasibly well stocked pistols into my brain and shot my wife at the dinner table.

Just....just....just........

Events
480 BC - Greco-Persian Wars: Battle of Artemisium - the Persians achieve a naval victory over the Greeks in an engagement fought near Artemisium, a promontory on the north coast of Euboea. The Greek fleet holds its own against the Persians in three days of fighting but withdraws southward when news comes of the defeat at Thermopylae.
1919 - Constitution of Weimar Republic adopted.
1972 - Vietnam War: the last United States ground combat unit departs South Vietnam.
1988 - Al-Qaeda formed

Births
1944 - Ian McDiarmid, Scottish actor
1953 - Hulk Hogan, American professional wrestler
1967 - Joe Rogan, American television host

Deaths
480 BC - Leonidas, King of Sparta
897 - Wilfred the Hairy, Count of Barcelona

Holiday
Saint Philomena

My cousin has written a book and she has a website up to publicise it. Here be obligatory pimping

http://www.zubisrises.com/excerpts.asp

The early turn cleaner at my local Tescos wears white, crocodile skin, pointy toed, cuban heels to work every day. He says he wants to die in them he loves them so much so he wears them everywhere.

I did wonder what floor cleaner will do to them eventually.

He told me not to worry, he bought two pairs.

I love him.

Tom Blount discussing George W Bush in 'The Family' by Kitty Kelley;

"Tom recalled thinking to himself, 'This guy thinks he is such a cuntsman,'"

So, this means something else right?

While driving along the road today I was priviledged enough to catch sight of the greatest dress ever made. It was made from four bolts of cloth sewn together at a diagonal angle all depicting 'The Sacred Heart of Jesus.' (Excuse the shit description, I hope you get the picture.) This went along with a matching headress all made out with lurid purple borders. We turned around to take a photo but the good lady had gone :(

I want one.

10 movies I like described by their IMDb keywords. Guess away.

1. Contest, Independent Film, Based on Book,Body Building
Pumping Iron, mrsquidward
2. Mystery, Cryonics, Spacecraft
Event Horizon, 2pumps
3. Ellis Island New York, No Opening Credits, Dysfunctional Family
Godfather Part 2, 2pumps
4. Irish Mob, Undercover, Violence
The Departed, Kalbear
5. African American, Ghetto, Basketball, School, College
Hoop Dreams, fatprick
6. Toilet, Payback, Dancing, Injection
PULP FICTION
7. Diabetes, Tough Guy, Memory Lapse
Memento, Aoife
8. Gatling Gun, Reality TV, Disinformation, Hockey
Running Man, mrsquidward
9. Murder, Exploding House, Dark Comedy, Swan
Hot Fuzz, mrsquidward
10. Stylised, Atmospheric, Sorceror, End of Mankind
THE LORD OF THE RINGS, RALPH BAKSHI STYLE

From Amazon;

'We wanted to give you an update on the status of your order [203-6395586-3508737].

We are sorry to report that the following items have been delayed.

Joe Abercrombie (Author) "The Blade Itself: Book One of The First
Law (Gollancz SF)" [Paperback]'


I only ordered it six weeks ago, anyone reckon he has black-balled me?

First Ireland miss out on the Grandslam because of an injury time try (would have been first one since 1948). Then we lose the Championship to France after two injury time tries in two different matches today. Unbefuckingleivable.

Hard to take scoring 17 tries and conceding 5 in 5 matches and still not winning.

The performances, especially the England game, make for a very positive tournament but right now it sucks ass.

Hopefully being this close will motivate the lads going into to the WC to get rid of the silly mistakes and we can have a real crack at France.

I am going to the WC btw :)

I think I will turn of the lights again and retreat to my emo.

If you have read 2pumps LJ then you know that someone tried to steal the handbags of a couple of my friends while we were out on Friday night. I had to give a statement yesterday to the police. So I headed down to the station. In front of me in the queue were three people. A hugely muscled dude, a mini-me of him and a young lady. I was standing behind them and I started to listen to what they were saying to work out whether I should call the number I had been given in case there was a queue.

'Sir, why are you sure we would want to arrest you when we have not contacted you.'
'Because you took a load of drugs from my house this morning.'
'Did one of the officers ask you to come down here?'
'No, I was out when you raided my house.'
'Then how do you know it was us?'
'Because my mum saw some police and you left a poster on my door.'
'Did the officer tell your mother to ask you to come here?'
'No, she told me to.'
'Ok then, so how do you know we seized drugs?'
'Because they were there when I went out and gone when I came back.'
'Ok, let me check this for you.'

He turns around to the other two, 'Are they joking?' PC comes back.

'Well sir, you are not wanted for anything at the moment.'
'But you have come to my house twice in the last few days.'
'How do you know that sir?'
'Because I didn't answer the door to you.'
'Well you are a suspect in four drugs related cases but we have no warrant for you at the moment.'
'Do you not want to talk to me about them then?'
'Not at the moment. Could you come back later?'

I start laughing. Dude turns around and starts shaking his head at me, the girl starts laughing.

'Are you joking me?'
'Well there is no-one here at the moment who wants to talk to you but we have someone coming in on the late turn who might want to.'
'So should I go home then?'
'Well, stay somewhere where we can contact you.'
'You raided it this morning. I think you know where it is.'
'Ok then, come back at about 2 then.'
'Are you telling me that I can't hand myself in?'
'Not at the moment, you are not wanted for anything.'
'Even though you took a load of drugs from my house this morning?'
'Well I have no record of that here, it may not have been processed yet.'

Girl calls the dude, his mum is on her mobile.

'Hello. Yeah I am there now. No, they won't have me. No mum. No mum. Mum! I swear to you I am here now. Do you want to talk to them? Mum, I swear to you. I have to come back later. I don't know why. Ok mum. Yes I will tidy it all up. No I won't go back to bad. I will watch TV or something. Yes mum I will put it all away. Yes mum. Yes mum, 2 O'Clock. I will mum. Bye.'

'You sure you don't want to take me in now?'
'No, we don't want to just now.'
'You lot are a fucking joke.'

They leave.

(Abridged version, this went on for half an hour)

Absolutely pissed myself laughing.

Well, I got a call at work today (I work for London Underground btw) to attend a station where someone had fallen on to the tracks. I got there and it turns out a 14 yo kid who was pissing about with his mates had tripped over onto the live rails. The poor kid died.

It is part of my job that you may have to deal with something like this, we all know it and talk about it. I have always said that I would fall apart. Turns out all my training kicked in and was too busy sorting shit out to be able to take it all in. I just switched onto auto-pilot. That was until his family turned up. Meeting his parents pretty much broke me. When we talk about dealing with this it is usually with reference to a suicide but this kid just tripped as he was running, a stupid accident and he is no longer here. Fuck.

I was talking to my dad, an ex-policeman, the other day and I said that I had never seen a dead body. He said I was very lucky, he wasn't wrong. Fucking kid looked about 12. I won't go into details but it was not a sight which will leave me anytime soon and I had to arrange for lighting, access, safety and stuff. I was there for hours. How do people go to work every day knowing that this is the stuff they have to face. I have nothing but admiration for them. For me this is a rare occurance which may never happen to me again.

I just got a call now as some of the kid's friends have come back to that station and have been threatening the staff. I am waiting for a cab now and I have to go and face a group of angry, confused 14 year olds who are looking for someone to blame. I guess that I will be that someone for a while. WTF do you say to them?


This comes on the same day when a 3 year old kid at my nephew's nursery was run over by an ambulance and killed. The ambulance was there to show the kids as a treat. Again, fuck. You take your kid to nursery and you never see them again.


As ever my daughter can cheer me up at the worst of times and something she said today has made me smile when I have needed a break. Her balloon floated away today and she was upset, the only balloons we had were the WWRTD? ones so I gave her one of them.

'What does the writing say Daddy?'
'WWRTD.What would Randyl Tarly do?'
'I don't know.'

I have moved back home to try and get things sorted out.
I missed my kids like mental and it is great to be back with them. No rows so far but things are all a bit weird.
I have no idea what happens next but I got a call from one of my friends who is over in Australia and he is going through pretty much the same thing which is entirely weird. Nice to be able to talk to him about it though. He said that he thought he might be back in the UK by summertime. I guess we are both waiting to see what will occur.
Trying to do some catching up at work on all the things I have not been focused on recently but it is not working. I still haven't told my boss what is happening despite the fact that he is being really nice about my utter shiteness. He asked me to e-mail him as I won't see him for a couple of weeks. Started that e-mail a few times but it always ends up sounding crap. I would rather tell him face to face but that isn't going to happen.
Suck it up and get on with it I guess.

A week after the London Party and still so many, many reasons to be emo. Not a great week alround but rather than focus on the negative I am making a step towards looking at the positive.

Liverpool won the FA Cup which is the shizzle nizzle. Did it the hard way, twats almost killed me, but Stevie G showed again how he is the bast playa in teh wurld evah!!!!!!! If he plays like that this summer England might even have a chance. Probability is Beckham will stifle SG and FL as usual. :(

Also watching Have I Got News For You and Green Wing (thanks for the reccie) cheered me up a bit. Having been playing City of Heroes for 18 months I had forgotten what TV was I think. Speaking of which, I cancelled my COH account as MMOs are just way too much of a timesink. Another reason to be positive but a bit emo to say goodbye to some guild friends.

So basically sport and TV have cheered me up. I may just be that shallow dick Sean always told me I am, hmmm.

Some bastard get another Eurocommie meet sorted will you!